Letter. Lovisa Rosell

You have three children, and you work as a doula. Why did you decide to work as a doula?

“Birth and especially home birth have been a big part of my childhood. I have five siblings and my mother has had an impact on me in the way she talked about birth and how empowering it can be. It made me curios and interested in understanding the mysterious world of giving birth which at the same time is such a natural part of everyday life. I clearly remember when a neighbor gave birth at home and put a candle in the window, so we all knew what had happened. From that time, I think I knew that I wanted to work with women and birth when growing up.”

Lovisa’s children; Isaac Eli 8 years, Luna Indra 6 years, Florian Lion 3 years and Lovisa’s mother Tova Rosell and Lovisa’s sister Signe Rosell.

What is your job as a doula?

“I would describe it as a person who supports and follows a woman closely during her pregnancy, birth and postpartum. When working as a doula two days are never the same, because we are different and have different wishes for giving birth.”

What do you love the most about working as a doula?

“I love every aspect of this work. I meet so many different people who have one thing in common as they are facing one of the biggest things in life. Still their wishes and approaches are so individual. One’s dream birth can be another’s nightmare. We all have different backgrounds and what we have been through in life, what we have seen, will affect us and our approach, also to giving birth. Going from pregnancy, to giving birth and to becoming a mother and a family is a transformative, sometimes challenging, and emotional journey. A journey I am humble to be a part of. I love the unknown that comes with birth. We can plan a lot, we can have a vision, write a letter with wishes for giving birth but when giving birth we must open ourselves and let go of control. Because we cannot control everything, and in this moment, we need to meet and trust life and ourselves in a way we not usually do.”

“Going from pregnancy, to giving birth and to becoming a mother and a family is a transformative, sometimes challenging, and emotional journey. A journey I am humble to be a part of.”

Your most intense experience as a doula?

“I carry so many beautiful, strong, and emotional memories from my work as a doula. But unexpected dramatic situations are also part of life and there have been a few situations where both life and death have been present for a few seconds, and you don’t know in which direction life will take you. These memories I will never forget, and they will always stay close to my heart.”

On your Instagram you celebrate motherhood, pregnancy, and breast feeding. What message do you wish to share with other women?

“In general, I don’t think that birth and motherhood are getting the attention it deserves. This is one of the reasons why I started writing about it on Instagram. Pregnancy, birth, and motherhood are huge changes in our lives, but in our culture, we don´t see that anymore. It is like nothing can be sacred anymore. It seems like motherhood should not be seen or heard too much, and we should preferably work until very close to our due date and then come back as quickly as possible – as if nothing had happened. Although everything has just happened. I want to encourage women to let pregnancy, birth, and motherhood influence all parts of their lives.”

“It seems like motherhood should not be seen or heard too much, and we should preferably work until very close to our due date and then come back as quickly as possible – as if nothing had happened. Although everything has just happened. I want to encourage women to let pregnancy, birth, and motherhood influence all parts of their lives.”

You are very focused on generations and what is passed on from one generation to the next. What do you carry with you from your own mother – and what do you have in common with your sister Signe who has the same background?

“I think I got the creativity, the humor, the trust in birth and motherhood and perhaps the most important: To stay close to my own believes no matter what people will think or say. And as I grew up with my sister, I think we have the same energy. People often say we look similar. And that is true, we have the same spirit, but we are also different from each other. She is more direct and is getting things done. I think I am a bit more unstructured, and soft in my way of being.”

You clearly prioritize your kids while they are small. When did you make the decision to take care of them at home?

“Yes, I have chosen to keep my kids home the first years, for me nothing feels more important than to give them a calm start in life. But of-course that also comes with a price, as it is not the norm in our society to keep your kids home like this. People have opinions, and it can also be a little lonely sometimes as I don’t have so many other adults around. And it’s not a way of living if you want to get rich, ha, ha. But I also love the freedom. I have always been self-employed and prefer this way of living, so I am trying to combine work and family life without having to separate these two worlds too much.”

“It is not the norm in our society to keep your kids home like this, people have opinions, and it can also be a little lonely sometimes as I don’t have so many other adults around.”

How do you manage to find a balance between being a mother and taking care of yourself and nurturing your own needs so that you can do your best as a mother?

“I don’t. I think it is hard to find time to prioritize yourself when someone calls mama. But now my youngest is three years old and I feel a new freedom in my life – just booked a dance class and planned a girls’ weekend with friends later this fall. I have not been doing such things for many years. Giving back to yourself is really the way to become the best mother. I slowly start to understand this after 8 years of motherhood.”

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